berkarat?

dah berkarat kan? dah berkurung tak update ape2.. tak menaip di sini tapi back to old style.. menulis mengarang in my dairies. yeyeye, dah dapat laptop baru ayah belikan, well syukur sangat. tapi aku still tak buang my toshi. sayang sangat. tiga tahun hidup bersama, jadi teman amarah ku. my lovely toshi. 

my relationship dengan farah back to normal. macam dahulu kala but kitaorang dah tak bercakap soal hati. isu sensitive. me and bie. normal cuma bie busy. me and anaz? clueless. dia cam arghh ok fine drop the subject.

last week..happy gilak.

"beep..beep..bunyi msg then "kami otw nak pergi amik kamu"...hampir pengsan aku. pipah text me. dia and posh and moon nak picked up me kat office. mahu jumpe. dah nearly 4 tahun tak jumpe posh. then ponteng kerja lepas "goda" my supervisor suruh sign buku log. jumpe diorang and unpredictable jumpe anaz. again gaduh kat kepsi. he asked me why im changed..alot. siapa yang berubah? normal people changed..right? everybody changing. cuma dia pelik jumpe and pandang aku in dress and fully dressed up like a "girl". no more short and pajama. pipah cakap she smell something fishy between me and anaz. ikan la sangat. kami memang kena bergaduh no stop baru normal. as pipah said. he felt awkward if tak bergaduh dengan aku. aku tak dapat "tafsir" mata dia. cara dia pandang. tapi annoyinnnggggg... dia pandang then gelak jahat. pandang and gelak jahat. he treated me as.."invisible man", pura pura tak nampak and tak dengar. bila aku cam merajuk baruu...aish, he never changed. thats why dia tak nak aku berubah? entah aku pun tak suka diri aku sekarang. cuma tak kan aku nak stay in 16 punyer style? anaz? we still befriend like before? entah.. clueless.