Alone..Breaking me down

hey u, happy birthday. As usual, u came & go without any clue.

as i told everyone..im gave up but my heart still into u, my heart gonna wait forever. im still holding on to u.
Stupid right? giant gigantic stupid woman. im stupid before, because i let my pride be top over everything. Now? im stupid because my pride wouldnt let me be real. even for a while.

Ape yang aku rasa towards u now? ape jawapan aku if people around me always asking why im so heartless? they have no clue, no idea, they will never know how i feel. how i're broke inside. how i fight with this loneliness.

"A serious girl, when she finds someone who calms her spirit & quiets her busy thoughts, she will love u so fiercely, it will defy even her own logic & reasoning"

 - it is so true. i cant find my logic & the reason why i love u so much. why i still holding on to a person who already died since 6 yrs ago? love u last 8 years, still love u after u banned me in ur life, still lov u now. love u in past, now & present? dont know, because i already loss my sanity & cannot find it back.


_happy birthday my ice_